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Joke of the Day

"You go for a run then post your route to Facebook. I dig a hole on that route then cover it with sticks and leaves. We both get exercise."

"What kind of underwear do old people wear? ...Depends."

"Impressing the McDonald's drive thru people with my music is always a top priority"

"Every day I thank God for giving me the power to keep being an atheist!"

"A Jewish child needs some money So he asks his father, ""Father, may I have fifty dollars?"" The father says ""Fifty dollars?! What do you need forty dollars for? I don't even have thirty dollars!"""

"The leading cause of depression is reality."

"Sometimes I wish I was a mermaid. Maybe then HR would stop hassling me for wearing a seashell bra on casual Fridays."

"don't joke about arthritis It's too close to the bone"

"An arranged marriage is just another way of saying that your parents helped you get laid."

"How come Barbie never got pregnant? Because Ken, came.... In another box!"