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Joke of the Day

"How do you make a hormone? Pay well, and give her the best time you can."

"What's the hardest thing to do when you go rollerblading? Telling your parents that you're gay."

"Today I found Jesus in my life. Let me tell you about him. He is tan with a thick black mustache, and eyes so brown they make your soul melt. He is my gardner, the best I have ever employed."

"A black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? The police. They're the police, racist."

"Do you know there is a serial number printed on every condom? I guess you haven't rolled it down far enough."

"Flossed for the first time in a long time. .... I don't remember eating all that blood, but a lot got stuck in there."

"Gf: do I look fat in these pants? Brain: oh god it's a trap, this is what we've been training for Me: I've seen worse Brain: WTF MAN"

"I don't always roll a joint, But when I do it's my ankle"

"My Girlfriend Has Always Wanted To Wake Me Up With A Blowjob So today I woke her up with one"

"I went into the library and asked if they had a copy of the book, ""How to spot a lady-boy"". He said, ""I'm sure we do, it's probably tucked away somewhere"". I said ""That's the one""."