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Joke of the Day
"I used to steal punchlines from others I still do, but I used to, too."
Next Joke
"A joke about procrastination. Eh, I'll write it later."
"What's the difference between a Priest and Acne? Acne waits until you're 13 to come on your face"
"Just bought a Ken doll. I don't know what everyone's talking about, you can't read books on this thing."
"Melania Trump released a statement about the alleged plagiarism. These accusation really hurt me, and my kids. Sasha and Malia."
"Did you hear the one about the shrimp throwing a fit? He was just being tempuramental."
"So Isaac Newton sits under a coconut tree..."
"Capital Reward Stoners get stoned in Saudi Arabia"
"I wish you'd told me you were happy just flirting on twitter. I've already bought plane tickets and murdered my wife."
"My doctor diagnosed me with schizophrenia and ADHD. Which means I hear voices but not for long enough to drive me insane."