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Joke of the Day
"Q: How did the hermit pay for his home? A: Alone."
Next Joke
"When I die, please bury me wrapped in a sheet. That way I won't have to look for one when I become a ghost"
"Did you hear about the duck that got thrown away? He was down in the dumps."
"This year I'm going to put the mistletoe in my back pocket, so people I hate can kiss my ass."
"Who do you pat with encouragement when they fail to work? A Remote control"
"I hate killing bugs so instead I spend hours trying to get it in a cup so I can toss it outside after accidentally taking off 3 of its legs."
"A man was walking his dog through a graveyard when he saw another man crouching behind a gravestone. ""Morning!"" he said. The other man replied, ""No, just taking a shit."""
"Time zones are crazy On new years eve some parts of the world are in 2017, some are in 2016, and a large portion of the U.S. is still stuck in 1940."
"How can you tell that pirates hid the communist manifesto Because an ""X"" Marx the spot"
"What did the Philosophy Ph.D say to the fat black woman? Welcome to McDonalds. May I take your order?"