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Joke of the Day
"What did the parrot say on Independence Day? Polly wants a firecracker!"
Next Joke
"Things I learned from media: Sanders has won a bunch of states but must drop out Rubio shows he's a contender by losing nearly everywhere"
"What do you call an undercover cop? A pig in a blanket."
"Why is the Kremlin so much warmer this winter? It had new windows Putin"
"Hilary's reaction to learning Bill has been cheating. ""I know."""
"The advert said, ""Just two pounds a week can help reduce the problem of domestic violence in the UK."" I suppose I could cut down, and only pound the wife twice a week."
"""And why do you want to work at the aquarium?"" * imagines me with a mermaid tail swimming in the giant tank after hours* I like fish"
"Don't look for a job in a funeral company It's a dying industry"
"Football legend Michael Owen has announced he's releasing a new fragrance It's going to be called ""My Cologne""."
"My hangover has been going on for so long that I'm beginning to wonder if Peter Jackson directed it."