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Joke of the Day

"Scientists have finally discovered the secret of longevity of hedgehogs... ...It turns out, there is no secret. They don't even live that long."

"55% of people will yawn after reading the word ""yawn."""

"Florist: ""Would you like your flowers wrapped?"" Me: ""Nope, they're going right into the shredder before I give them to my sister-in-law."""

"They ran out of bread at the Indian restaurant, but it turned out nobody cared. It was a naan issue."

"Why can't you trust snakes ? They speak with forked tongues !"

"There was a praying mantis in my room so I stealthily grabbed a shoe and smashed my 2nd-story window and jumped out."

"Two elephants jumped off a cliff....... BOOM BOOM!"

"How do you make a horomone? You don't pay her. (My mom is sick. Hilarious. But sick. )"

"I wonder Is Gordon Lightfoot heavy handed?"

"Just vacuumed for the first time in a really long time and apparently I have hardwood floors?"