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Joke of the Day

"One of my buddies lost his right arm in a car accident which is a huge bummer, so much money wasted on tattoos"

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"Why did the chicken cross the school yard? To get to the other slide!"
"What do you call a wandering caveman? A Meanderthal I'll go now."
"What happened to the engineer who miss labeled all the floor numbers He was wrong on so many levels."
"What's a narcissist's favorite color? Reflection"
"If I were a rat, I wouldn't give my ass either."
"I'm not only a workaholic, I drink at home too."
"Why did the Hydroxyl molecule blow up the US Mint? It was a Free Radical."
"Came home to find my girlfriend packing her stuff... I asked her what she was doing, she says ""I'm leaving you, you sick peadophile!"" ""Peadophile! That's a big word for an 8 year old!"""
"(Mayday) PILOT: I didn't go thru 9 years of flight school to crash ME: *relieved* Thank G- P: I went through 0, so the crash will make sense"