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Joke of the Day

"I asked my wife if she wanted to watch a movie with Matthew McConaughey... She said it's not a Matthew McKindaDay."

"Coach Krzyzewski thinks he's playing wheel of fortune... ""I'd like to buy a foul"""

"What did the O say to the Q? Dude, your dick's hanging out."

"What is a cation afraid of? A dogion"

"This summer I'm going to go to the beach and bury metal objects that say, 'Get a life' on them. Demetri Martin"

"What's the best part of a pregnancy joke? The delivery."

"A polaroid is what an eskimo takes when he wants to bulk up."

"Gloria Gaynor's ghost I woke up last night to find the ghost of Gloria Gaynor standing at the foot of my bed. At first I was afraid.......then I was petrified."

"Life is a joke.. and death is the punch line."

"What do you get when you cross Jesus and a couple of criminals? A good Friday"