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Joke of the Day

"isaac newtown got hit in the head & invented calculus. i broke my nose last night when I was drunk & invented a louder version of crying."

"My friend thinks he so smart. He says onions are the only food that makes you cry. So I threw a coconut at his face"

"Fun typo: ""You ate the most important thing in my life."""

"john was feeling happy happy felt disgusted and ran away"

"What do you call a tuber that buys his girlfriend chocolates? A sweet potato."

"What do outlaws eat with their milk? Crookies."

"Why did the Muslim man let the air out of his sex doll? So he could blow it up again."

"My Grandfather has the heart of a lion, and a lifetime ban from the zoo."

"I want a Michael Corleone in the streets and a horse head in the sheets."

"What does Jared from Subway have in common with McDonald's? They put their meat in 10 year old buns."