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Joke of the Day

"Why do Mexicans always install those tiny steering wheels in their cars? So they can drive with the handcuffs on."

"I know I'm getting old when I see a beautiful 19 year old girl and I wonder what her mother looks like."

"What's Princess Leia's first name? Comoniwanna."

"If you hate crime... Is that a hate crime?"

"To all those telling me this account is a sin - Don't worry about it, I plan on forgiving myself later"

"What's black and never works? Decaf coffee, you racist bastard."

"Context is Key She's so coy. Is she part fish?!"

"What's the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi? People in Dubai don't like the Flintstones, but people in Abu Dhabidooo."

"My friend got jailed for six months for pulling 4 people out of a burning building. Turns out that they were the firemen."

"Conjecture: At some point in 2013, our neighbors will get so high that they accidentally sell their own weed. For weed money. To buy weed."