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Joke of the Day

"[2 T-Rex's getting drunk] ""I'm wasted."" ""Me too. You know how bad?"" ""Don't say it again."" ""I can't feel my face."" ""Goddammit, Kevin."""

"Life is that reality show character wearing a leopard print caftan saying ""Yer either gonna love me or hate me, I just tell it like it is"""

"What did the string say when the rope proposed marriage? ""Let's knot."""

"What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? Gmmmppphh"

"If I had a dollar... If i had a dollar for every racist comment i've ever made, a black guy would probably mug me."

"I really can't believe the price some women pay for sunglasses. I'm starting to think it'd be cheaper to get the kitchen window tinted."

"""A mother takes twenty years to make a man of her boy, and another woman makes a fool of him in twenty minutes."""

"Text: How come you stopped drinking? Me: Because I kept waking up with you. Her: I hate you."

"I'm a Polish student in the UK Today the cashier in ASDA asked me if I needed help packing my bags. The Brexit is worse than I thought..."

"My neighbours really like Halloween They dress up as ghost every weekend and go out for lynch."