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Joke of the Day
"What is brown and sticky? Shit."
Next Joke
"A night-shift nurse finds a rectal thermometer in her pocket and says... ""Oh damn it, some asshole has my pen!"""
"I dont know why people are disappointed when they find out a celebrity crush is married.As if that was their only obstacle to being together"
"What do you call a feline massage therapist? A cat scratcher."
"How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know... I broke the lightbulb after I threw the first one."
"Somewhere in the world, a woman gives birth once a minute. It must suck to be her."
"What do Russians call their barbers? Combrade"
"Nice Fitbit bro. I didn't realize that they had a model you can wear around your ankle."
"If the tongue is a muscle I want your pussy to be my gym"
"I don't see dead people, I just see people that I wish were dead."