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Joke of the Day

"How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know... I broke the lightbulb after I threw the first one."

"What do you call a Mexican who has had his car stolen? Carlos"

"Whats grey and comes in pints? Elephants"

"So the American people's choices for President of the United States will most likely be Donald Trump or Hilary Clinton. That's it. That's the joke. There is no punchline."

"Why are bachelors thin, and married men fat? Bachelors come home, check to see what's in the fridge, and go to bed. ....Married men come home, check to see what's in the bed, and go the fridge."

"*returns tent to Target* CASHIER: What was the problem? ME: The packing implied that there would be a family that loves me inside the tent"

"How do hens encourage their football teams? They egg them on!"

"Why are so many Koreans named Park? Because the ones named Drive all died in crashes."

"[wearing World's Best Dad shirt] Wife: whys there blood on your shirt? Me: its not my blood Guy bleeding out in the yard: its not your shirt"

"[meta] why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other bar!"