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Joke of the Day
"""Opps"" is my favorite typo because it suggests the thrill of a secret counterinsurgency."
Next Joke
"I decided to come to my friends as transparent they saw right through me."
"> Unsubscribe from LinkedIn > Delete email account > Sell house, live in woods > Find bottle in river > Has note inside > It's from LinkedIn"
"How convenient, I can cook this lasagna in the microwave in 30 seconds, or in my oven in 4 days."
"Just saw the first duckface of Spring."
"How do you weight a fish? With a scale."
"Why can't two Chinese people make a white baby? Because two Wongs don't make a white"
"Dorothy: We have to see the wonderful Wizard of Oz Toto: OK but I wouldn't make a song and dance about it Dorothy: [inhaling] Toto: FFS"
"How do you titillate an ocelot? You oscillate its tit a lot."
"We had a proper, serious, grown-up discussion about pornography recently, and my girlfriend said, ""I don't get porn. Why would I want to watch to people have sex?"" I said, ""Two? People?"""