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Joke of the Day
"What's the easiest way to make a homeless person bleed? Brush their teeth!"
Next Joke
"If you say ""Starbucks"" in the mirror 3 times, a girl in yoga pants will appear, steal your hoodie and tell you the best things about Fall."
"What will happen if you put anal lube where oil should be in your car? I don't really know, but I think it will run pretty shitty"
"Q: Why did the fly fly? A: Because the spider spied her."
"A soldier keeps a mug upside down and tells the sergeant: - I can't drink from this mug. It has no opening. The sergeant examines the mug and says: - You are right. And besides this it has no bottom."
"There was a praying mantis in my room so I stealthily grabbed a shoe and smashed my 2nd-story window and jumped out."
"oops i queefed"
"What do you call a dog riding in a submarine? A subwoofer."
"What is the key to being a successful and lucrative locksmith? There isn't one."
"Abortion sure brings out the kid in you."