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Joke of the Day

"Every program on MTV could have been titled ""Jackass""."

"How did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field."

"Do you like tapes and CDs? Cuz I'm gonna tape my dick to your forehead, so you can see deez nuts."

"''Dyslexic man walks into a bra''"

"I wrote a book called My permanently exposed penis'. It's out now."

"The NSA isn't all that bad It's the only part of the American government that listens to its citizens!"

"If you have have a small green ball in one hand and another small green ball in the other, what do you have? Kermit the Frog's full attention."

"I'm pretty sure my kids got my good looks... My wife still has hers."

"How do you stop a mexican tank? You shoot the guy pushing it."

"I'm here for whatever you need me to do from the couch."