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Joke of the Day

"Me: you want to end the date night with some bubbly? Wife: sure *I pour vinegar and baking soda into the volcano* Wife: this is so romantic"

Next Joke
 
"Doc: Maam, due to the accident your daughter cant... Mom: Cant what?! D: She cant even. She literally cannot even. M: *single tear falls*"
"What did the homeless yogi say when told to leave the yoga studio? Nah, I must stay."
"QWOP must be what it's like to run for autistic people."
"whats a ghost's favorite fruit? booberries!"
"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? **[Deleted]**"
"Boss: Did you bring the reports? Me: Hold on. *reaches into pockets and pulls out two middle fingers* Boss: I resign. You're the boss now."
"What did the zombie body builder say? GAINSSS!!!"
"Why are gay people bad liars? They can't keep a straight face"
"I wish I had the exciting social life my mom must have envisioned when she used to stitch my name into my underwear."