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Joke of the Day

"Why does Star Wars have 100s of people using lasers to fight and literally NOBODY using them to etch cute wooden drink coasters"

"Want to hear a great joke? Well then fuck you because I'm typing off a keyboard."

"Girls are magic... They get wet without water, can bleed without injuries and get boneless things hard!"

"when the ice cream man drives down my street I walk alongside him screaming TAKE ME WITH YOU I WILL BEAR YOU MANY STRONG SONS"

"What do you call a funny jar of mayonnaise? Lmayo!"

"Who did the breeder call when his horse was possessed by an evil spirit? An exhorsist!"

"My boyfriend and I checked out a new coffee shop in town... I asked him how his coffee was. ""It's like making love in a canoe."" ""That good?"" I asked ""No. It's fucking close to water."""

"The USA should invade the USA and win the hearts and minds of the population by building roads, bridges and putting locals to work."

"LOOK AT HOW HE OUTGUNS ME http://xboxclips.com/Kolt+the+Don/f1dd03d5-32b3-4238-9134-393050b8d254"

"Morning is the time when everyone is jealous of unemployed."