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Joke of the Day

"I sneezed while pissing and almost pissed everywhere I think I have PEE-T-S-D now :( That was scary"

"Did you hear about the cow who gambled on an airplane? The steaks couldn't have been higher."

"Did Adam and Eve have bellybuttons? *reason #42 why I can't fall asleep"

"I'm not hungry but I'm going to eat these Oreos because they're there. Americans."

"Why did the atoms cross the road? It was time to split."

"I'm definitely the drunkest person in this ball pit."

"How are Asians and Smart Cars similar? They are yellow can they only hold small packages"

"Why does Caterpie like Margarine? Because it's Butterfree."

"This one took me a while to get when I was a kid: Three guys walk into a bar The fourth one ducked."

"Someone told me to stop singing Wonderwall. I said maybe."