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Joke of the Day

"How many Harvard graduates does it take to change a light bulb? One. He just puts it in the socket and lets the world turn around him."

"It was a terrible summer for Humpty Dumpty. But he had a great fall."

"bay: come over me: no you're a broad inlet of the sea where the land curves inward bay: my parents aren't home me: how are you talking"

"ME (tousling his hair): You got a girlfriend? 8 YEAR-OLD: Yeah ME (grabbing him by the collar): How. How did you do it"

"Do you know the difference between a strip club and an elementary school? If you dont your a sick mothafucker!!!"

"Q: What happens if you cross a midget and a computer? A: You get a short circut."

"How many virgins do I get from dying of embarrassment? Does anyone know?"

"Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews."

"What is 13 inches long, has a purple head and makes a woman scream all night long? Crib death."

"Why can't there be peace in the Middle East? It IS what it IS."