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Joke of the Day

"Beware of Lawyers 7 ""Are!you!a!lawyer?"" ""Yes."" ""How!much!do!you!charge?"" ""A!hundred!dollars!for!four!questions."" ""Isn't!that!awfully!expensive?"" ""Yes.!What!is!your!fourth!question?"""

"don't tell me starbucks isn't an emotion i feel that shit in my soul"

"Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Lego man: Is it because I'm block?"

"I've always wanted a job cleaning mirrors... It's just something I can see myself doing."

"Why was the baguette excited for his audition? He heard he might be playing a big roll"

"We must be subatomic particles, because I feel strong force between us."

"Becoming a vegetarian Is a big missed steak."

"I wish mirrors and pictures would get together already and agree on what I really look like."

"Asia and his father are playing a board game. Asia's father takes his turn. He looks at Asia and says, ""Europe, Asia."""

"Me: *applies temporary tattoos* Mom: Unicorn tats? Me: I'm in a gang. Mom: Ha! With who, Lisa Frank? Me: You just made a powerful enemy."