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Joke of the Day

"My mom asked me a question and when I went to answer she said, ""Hold on I can't hear you. I gotta turn on the light."" The dark was too loud?"

"Do you want to hear a racist joke? Donald Trump"

"Remember when you were at a friend's house & their folks fought & you didn't know where to look? It's how I get when Glee does a rap song..."

"A black guy walks into the bar with a parrot on his shoulder The bartender then says ""Well that's special, where did you get it?"" ""Africa"" says the parrot"

"What did Salt 'N' Pepa say to the nosey chemist? ""It's none of your Bismuth!"" Sorry."

"How many vampires does it take to open the Curtain on Daylight? Just one with depression."

"i like how at the end of old movies it says the end' so you arent horrorstruck by the thought of a fictional universe persisting unobserved"

"What did one giant squid say to the other giant squid? What's Kraken!"

"This guy told me that playing the voilin is the best way to calm you down. I bet he never tried smashing it over someone's head."

"Driver: My God... that weasel... Onlooker: He just went... ""pop""... Weasel's family: *sobbing* Ice-cream man: I've got an idea for a song y'all."