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Joke of the Day

"Nothing wakes you up faster than a 5 y/o kicking open your door like SWAT and jumping on you in bed."

"Why did the KKK member fail his calculus class? Because he didn't believe in integration."

"[makes a voodoo doll of himself] [gives it a little back rub]"

"What is the worst thing you want to hear from a doctor giving you a prostate exam? ""Look ma, no hands!"""

"How do you know your wife's dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up."

"What do you call a homeless horse? Unstable."

"I need to go Wal-Mart but I don't wear pajamas, I'm not a NASCAR fan and I'm not fat. This is what I call a conundrum."

"I found the quickest way for a woman to make you a millionaire. See, first you need to be a billionaire..."

"0 Two muffins baking in the oven. One says ""Bloody hell! It's hot in here."" The other spins around..... ""AAAHHHHHH!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!! GET ME OUT!!!!"""

"What do you call a company that makes Mexicans? A MexiCo."