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Joke of the Day

"I was so depressed dat my ATM displayed someone else's balance to cheer me up"

"A new girlfriend asked me ""How did you manage to stay single for so long?"" Single Handedly"

"My wife asked me if I wanted to be cremated after my death Or immediately before."

"I masturbated so good last night That i woke up to find my dick making breakfast"

"If the dove is the bird of peace... ...what is the bird of true love? The swallow."

"I saw a beaver build something before it set on fire, Hot dam."

"My girlfriend broke up with me because of my obsession with Linkin Park But in the end, it doesn't even matter."

"""WHAT DO WE WANT?"" ""Hearing aids."" ""WHEN DO WE WANT THEM?"" ""Hearing aids."""

"Anybody taking bath in Milk.. ""Why do you take baths in milk?"" ""I can't find a cow tall enough for a shower."""

"Did you hear about the man running a marathon on the afghanistan border? He actually went 3 miles further... I guess Iran* a little too far *I'm pronouncing it ""e-ran"""