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Joke of the Day

"Two parrots were sitting on a perch. One said to the other, ""It smells fishy around here."""

"I fucked up making my coffee today \#nofilter"

"Two necrophiliacs are having lunch together. One asks the other ""so how's your love life?"" His friend replies ""not so good, that rotten cunt split on me"""

"I clicked on the ""Random"" link in the navigation bar and it brought me to the Toronto Maple Leafs subreddit Guess I mistakenly clicked on the ""Funny"" link in the navigation bar instead."

"Small Horse - Tai Ni Po Ni"

"Ever hear the one about the deaf guy? Neither did he."

"Your opinion is very important to me, please remain on the line until it goes to voicemail."

"ME: haha u dare me to take off all my clothes and run thru this park COP: no ME: wow I cant believe ur making me do this lol COP: I'm not"

"5: Can you cut off the skin? Me: What? 5: *holds up sandwich* the skin M: The crust? 5: yeah M: No, and you sound like a serial killer."

"A girl says to a salesman, ""I'm not sure if I should buy a sweatshirt or a windbreaker."" He says, ""Well, that depends. Are you gonna sweat, or are you gonna break wind?"""