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Joke of the Day

"Me: I can't believe we have $900 for Christmas gifts this year! Fridge: I don't feel well. I think I have a fever."

"What do Americans do immediately after winning the World Cup (Soccer)? Turn off the Playstation."

"Apple is suing Qualcomm for selling them overpriced chips. Punchline ends."

"Why is Captain Hook good at getting away with murder? He leaves no fingerprints"

"Dating: *prances around in underwear and his t-shirt* Marriage: *Unzips footed unicorn onesie* Do you think this mole is cancer?"

"Q: How does Bill keep Gennifer Flowers away from the White House? A: He keeps offering to send Ted Kennedy over to give her a ride."

"Why'd the Titanic stop putting out on the first date? The iceberg had said 'just the tip'"

"I masturbate so much in the shower I get wet when it rains"

"If porno was realistic, there would be kids knocking on the door yelling that spongebob was on a commercial break."

"i always get gatorade and gasoline confused. my car is real good at sports and im dead"