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Joke of the Day
"I got a sweater for Christmas. Wish I'd gotten a screamer or a squirter."
Next Joke
"A man goes to heaven he says to God ""i've been dying to meet you."""
"Some people you know were dropped on their heads as babies. Some were clearly thrown in the air, hit the ceiling fan, bounced off the wall & fell out the window."
"How does a witch make scrambled eggs? She holds the pan and gets two friends to make the stove shake with fright."
"Sitting on my hand until it gets numb so it feels like someone else is folding my laundry."
"Rudolph's red nose is actually the result of a parasitic infection in his respiratory system. Stay woke."
"How did the hipster drown? he jumped in the mainstream"
"What is the derivative of 151? Poke(dx)"
"FACT: Uma Thurman is the only person to ever have been named by someone with a mouthful of food."
"If you read the instructions carefully, the first step to making any microwavable lunch is to throw away the box and dig it out of the trash"