14182

Joke of the Day

"The judge told me I might get capital punishment for my crimes, and asked me if I knew what it meant.. I didn't, so I told him to use it in a sentence."

Next Joke
 
"s/o to the first person who saw a horse and was like ""YO i wanna sit on that thing and make it take me places"""
"Star Wars Casting Did you hear Carrie Fischer is going to be in the new Star Wars movies? She is going to be the new Jabba the Hutt!"
"Hello is this HP? I'd like to make a return. I ordered a Laser Jet and you sent me a printer."
"What sits in the middle of the world wide web ? A very very big spider !"
"How hard do you think Joe Biden laughs when a senate's bill gets 69 votes? I bet he has to leave the room."
"A man was found with his dick in a peanut butter jar... He was fucking nuts."
"What are the longest hairs in the body? Nose hairs, because pulling them out is a pain in the ass."
"QUESTIONS YOU CAN ANSWER BY PEEING ON THINGS: 1. Am I pregnant? 2. Does my boss have a very forgiving nature?"
"My wife has a seashell tattooed on the inside of her leg if you lay your ear on it, you smell the sea"