141783
Joke of the Day
"Why are there fences around cemeteries? people are dying to get in."
Next Joke
"what do you call an unqualified baffoon with an incoherent agenda? 2016 republican nominee Donald Trump"
"Mom: If a boy touches your boobs say ""don't"" and if he touches your pussy say ""stop""? Girl: But mom, he touched both so I said ""don't stop"". "
"Took my pet lion in an elevator along with shocked shoppers this morning. There was quite an uproar."
"[drunk w/ 2 kittens at a bar] give me another ""haven't u had enough?"" i'll tell u when i've had enough! *bartender hands me another kitten*"
"Bandwagon fans make me so mad, I've hated Benghazi for decades"
"How many software engineers does it take to change a lightbulb? None. That's a hardware problem."
"How did Stevie Wonder meet his wife? On a blind date"
"First time and with a hooker They are both naked and he says -""this is my first time..."" she says -""relax and tell me what you like..."" -""cheesburguer"""
"So anyway, this guy calls a plumber... ""Hey, plumber, I gotta leak in my basement."" Plumber says, ""Go ahead fellow, it's your basement."""