151854

Joke of the Day

"Took my pet lion in an elevator along with shocked shoppers this morning. There was quite an uproar."

"I bought my friend an elephant for his room... He said, ""Thanks"". I said, ""Don't mention it""."

"Me: excuse me, but I can't taste the alcohol Clerk: all smoothies are non alcoholic here. Me: YOU SHOULDN'T CALL YOURSELF A BAR THEN!"

"""Hey, long time. Wassup?"" should be auto-corrected to ""Dude. Can you do me a favor?"""

"What's the best thing about picking up a homeless chick? It doesn't matter where you drop them off."

"The letter E is used frequently and infrequently."

"Q: How does a stereotypical blonde spell Farm? A: E-I-E-I-O."

"A Girl on Twitter, finally gave birth,Now she's been tweeting her baby pics every 20min & Makes me feel I am raising her child with my Data"

"Welcome to heaven, here is your harp. Welcome to hell, here is your accordion."

"What do you call a black man flying a plane A pilot, what're you racist?"