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Joke of the Day

"Why do owners of muffler shops sleep so good at night? They're exhausted."

"*accidentally deletes a tweet* MY LITERATURE!"

"What do you give a teenage girl who can't even? A two-torial!"

"Where does Christopher keep his dance shoes? In the Walken closet."

"What's the difference between a deaf person and my wife? I don't know."

"Why Trump will win the election? He will use his Trump-card."

"Dark humor is kind of like food.. .. Not everyone gets it."

"A lion walks into a bar. Several people get up and leave predicting the impending danger at hand."

"So there was a pediatrist... no, wait a doct- a... Gynecologist *that's it!* Anyway... I walk in and... ""Sorry, I fucked up the delivery everybody. Also, your baby is dead."""

"Why do hurricanes travel so fast? Because if they travelled slowly we'd have to call them slow-i-canes."