14101

Joke of the Day

"I hate being bipolar it's awesome"

"A video montage of all the times my foot, still wet from the shower, has clung to my underwear as I pull them on, and I've lost my balance."

"The thing about penis jokes is.. they tend to grow on you."

"Meth, because teeth are annoying."

"Whats long, green, and smells like pork? Kermits finger"

"I used to work at a fire hydrant factory. Benefits were good, but the parking was terrible."

"Reddit must have seen your mom the other day... ...cause went down for while and has been *up* ever since."

"I spend 60%of my day worrying that I might have mustard on my face or clothing. The other 40% I am eating mustard."

"What do Mike Piazza, and an altar boy have in common? They were both catchers for the Padres."

"And Jesus said, ""Come forth and receive everlasting life...."" But John came fifth, and only received a toaster oven."