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Joke of the Day

"If it looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and barks like a pig, then I probably took too many pills."

"Why was the Hay Robber's prison sentence cut short? He got out on bale."

"A woman walks into a library and ask for a book on child birth. The librarian replies C-Section"

"This poor old lady slipped and fell on the ice today..... at least I think she was poor she only had 75 cents in her purse."

"Jeb! should be called WTC 7 Never reaching the heights of his namesakes, and falling down without being hit by anything."

"What's the difference between a girl in church and a girl in a bubble bath? The girl in church has her soul full of hope..."

"Batman: ""Shall we watch a film?"" Superman: ""Have you got Cape Fear?"" Batman: ""Only in revolving doors. Now, a film?"""

"People always ask, would you rather be right or happy? I have always found I'm happiest when I'm right!"

"pizza is my favorite winter activity"

"ME: Is this Babies R Us CASHIER: Yes ME: No babies work here C: I know ME: It should be called Babies Were US C: ... ME: Get me your manager"