140581
Joke of the Day
"Remember, when someone calls you mean... just tell them that you prefer the term average."
Next Joke
"British accent. Say ""Beer can"" with a British accent... I just taught you how to say ""Bacon"" with a Jamaican accent. ."
"What do you call a chicken staring at a lettuce? Chicken sees a salad"
"""Hey, my eyes are up here! LOL, just kidding, they're everywhere."" - the government"
"5: ""Mommy why not?"" Me: ""Because you're driving me crazy."" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"" 5: ""How?"""
"How do you guys feel about that new drug-resistant superbug? It makes me sick."
"I thought I would go and help out in Africa... ...turns out they have enough aids."
"what's the difference between peanut butter and jam you cant peanut butter your way in someones ass"
"yells ""PARKOUR"" then strokes a dog the wrong way, the camera zooms in on the dogs face, he portrays mild annoyance"
"What do Downton Abbey and Premenstrual Syndrome have in common? They're both period drama"