140440

Joke of the Day

"Bartender: A shot of whiskey can cleanse the soul Me: *thinks back to the time I ""experimented"" in college* I'll take 27 bottles please"

"My wife always tells me not to take things personally, so I hired a guy to do it for me. He already stole a bike."

"What do you call a prisoner who's psychic,has dwarfism and escaped the prison? A small medium at large!"

"I couldn't find you any new tampons. but I managed to pull a few strings..."

"What goes well with country music? Suicide."

"What do you say when you kill five black people with one grenade? (Offensive) Triple kill!"

"You never realize what have till its gone........ Toilet paper is a good example of this."

"After buying toilet paper at Walgreens, the cashier said, ""you'll need your receipt."" I don't think I've ever been this scared in my life..."

"Q: What is a grasshopper? A: An insect on a pogo stick."

"When I die I'd like to be cremated I think I've urned it."