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Joke of the Day

"Why did the guitar teacher go to jail? He fingered a minor"

"""And then we'll have the throat hole open up and a rectangle candy will drop from it. Kids will love it."" ~ Inventors of Pez dispensers."

"Me: Someone broke into the business next door last night. Coworker: Wasn't the building alarmed? Me: Buildings don't get scared. CW....."

"My mum doesn't work in IT. So I don't get why she looks at me and keeps repeating ""I wish there was an undo button."""

"What is easy to register for, but something you never want? Sex offender."

"A man gives his wife a glass of water and two aspirin His wife says, ""What are these for? I don't have a headache."" The man replies, ""Great! Let's f***!"""

"[1st day at work] BOSS: Erm..we..have No Smoking rules here ME: That's great Alan [blows out smoke] most places have loads of smoking rules"

"Me: What's w/the ice pack? 12: I have a headache. Me: Do you think it's a good idea to play video games if you have a headache? 12: Yes."

"Why do people think Saint Stephen was a marijuana addict? He was stoned to death."

"Yesterday was international women's equality day and international dog day What a great day for bitches"