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Joke of the Day

"I saw my ex wife in a grocery store. ""Having fun there?"" I asked her, as she felt up the apples. ""Does that remind you of someone?"" She said, ""No, but this does,"" Then she started rubbing the grapes."

Next Joke
 
"[ This one from the great /u/KingOfRibbles ] ""My sink was a bit dirty-"" ""-but all it needed was a little ...wiping!!!"""
"I heard that if you give Obama a prostrate massage The world will be at your finger tips."
"Hey commercials, thanks anyway but we're poor."
"Why did the bee put on a yarmulka He didn't want anyone to think he was a WASP."
"Have you heard that HPV had spread to birds? It has caused multiple cases of aviary cancer."
"What do you call a bunny with a crooked dick? FUCKS FUNNY"
"What word starts with F, ends with UCK, and people look for it when things get too hot... A Fuck. The word is ""fuck""... honestly, I lead you right to it"
"The other day I went to the doctors office. The doctor said to me, ""You've got to stop masturbating."" I replied, ""What? Why?"" The doctor answered, ""So I can examine you."""
"[1st day as criminal sketch artist] Victim: He was blonde had blue eyes, he was about 6ft t.... Me: I'm gonna need a longer sheet of paper"