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Joke of the Day

"welcome to hipster church. this is my body *bites vegan cookie* this is my blood *sips garage-brewed IPA*"

"""Taxi"" A: Hey, man! Please call me a taxi. B: Yes, sir. You are a taxi."

"Guy walks into a bar... Guy walks into a bar with jumper cables wrapped around his neck. Bartender said ""alright...but don't start nothing!"""

"I recently rewatched The Lion King and just noticed how many metaphors there were... I guess you can say there was a whole lot of *Simba*-lism."

"Why don't they have Oktoberfest in Africa? Because nobody there is much of a drinker."

"How do you make a flea circus? From scratch."

"What sound does Reddit make when it blows up? Pao! Edit: Whoa, FP *and* gold. Thank you!"

"How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? Just one but it takes nine visits."

"Why did the redneck Father walk his kid to school? They were in the same grade!!"

"I bet that in prison everyone's FB relationship status is set to ""it's complicated""."