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Joke of the Day
"I'm pretty certain I'll never be a serial killer, since I don't have a middle name."
Next Joke
"Why did the man go fishing? Just for the halibut."
"A guy stopped me on the street today and tried to sell me a coffin... I said ""That's the last thing I need"""
"How do you know when your girlfriend is getting fat? When she fits in your wife's jeans."
"What does a ghost eat for dinner? Spookhetti"
"My Wife made me choose between her, and my Love of Pointing out Doors ""If you want to leave"" I told her, ""There's the Door"""
"My kid just asked me where Washington 3-D is, because she wants to see the presidents house...Now I can't decide if she's cute, or retarded."
"Rap videos are completely unrealistic. Nobody has that many friends"
"My Facebook friends fall into 3 categories: vaguely remember, don't remember at all, or never want to speak to for the rest of my life."
"Brother: Do you want to come over to see the new baby? Me: Does it have wifi?"