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Joke of the Day

"A robot walks into a bar, orders a drink, and lays down some cash. The bartender says, ""we don't serve robots."" The robot replies, ""oh, but some day you will."""

"Why is it so hard to find Tylenol in the jungle? Because the parrots eat 'em all. . . . Explanation: Parrots eat 'em all = paracetamol = acetominophen = Tylenol"

"I was watching a TV program on various Religious orders and how the use stringed instruments. I was appalled by the amount of sects and violins!"

"A waiter walks up to a table full of Jewish women dining And says ""ladies, is anything ok?"""

"""What is the difference between a burger and a blow job?"" "" I don't know, what is the difference between a burger and a blow job?"" ""Let's go to lunch!"""

"Guitar players are actually quite a religious bunch... They've all found Gsus at some point."

"Patient: Doctor! You've got to help me! Nobody ever listens to me. No one ever pays any attention to what I have to say. Doctor: Next please!"

"Came up with this years ago while waiting for my mom to wake up that morning. What happened when the bike ran over a nail? It popped a wheelie."

"What's the definition of macho? Jogging home from your vasectomy."

"Why didn't the airline passenger check his vulture? Because it's a carrion bird."