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Joke of the Day

"What does a programmer do in the toilet? A log dump!"

"If I could have sex with any historical figure it would be Marie Antoinette. I hear she gives good head."

"I suck at video games. I mess up the character's life like I have my own. I played Mario today and he ended up $60K in debt and had 4 DUIs."

"Police found the neighbourhood paedophile shot in the head 27 times. Authorities ruled it the worst case of suicide in a decade."

"I hear an important member of Jehovah's Witness died He's knocking on heaven's door"

"On our honeymoon, more than anything, I wanted to join the Mile High Club... ...but my wife didn't give a flying fuck"

"What position does the pig play in football? Loinback."

"Poor Jared Fogle The prison Jared Fogle is housed in announced they were serving hot virgin Tom & Jerry's Christmas Day, imagine his disappointment."

"Just when you thought 2016 was over. Wham."

"Canada is 50% ""a"""