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Joke of the Day

"My daughter called Neapolitan ice cream ""three-way"" ice cream & I'm not sure I'll correct her cuz I'm a horrible person & it makes me laugh."

"How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? TWO....but it's really hard to get them in there"

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. -Me with beer, me without beer"

"I went to a restaurant that serves -breakfast at any time.- So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance."

"I want to make an alligator joke... But I'm afraid I'll get carried away."

"A man spread his late wife's ashes on the lawn... ...so he could still cut her at least once a week."

"What's Rick Ross's favorite nursery rhyme? Ring Around the Rooooozaaay."

"I'm not a competitive person I'll be the first to admit it."

"What's the difference between your job and your wife? Nobody does your job for you when you're out"

"My dad once said 'why are hemorrhoids called hemorrhoids and asteroids called asteroids and not the other way around?' I still laugh..."