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Joke of the Day

"How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? TWO....but it's really hard to get them in there"

"What's long, green, and smells like bacon? Kermit's finger."

"How much is Hillary Clinton's life insurance? Just one bill."

"What did the scarecrow say when asked about his job? ""This job isn't for everyone, but hay...it's in my jeans"""

"What's the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer? The taste. I'll show myself out."

"What do they call Snoop Dogg in Asia? Snoop Dinner"

"secret truth time: ive totally stayed in relationships longer than i shouldve bc i liked his pet more & felt bad leaving it with an asshole"

"Which presidential candidate does Tom Brady support? Whichever can reduce inflation."

"Mama Pig has a great new kitchen appliance that lets her prepare meals ahead. It's called a garbage compactor."

"What's the difference between a guy wearing a bullet proof vest and the English football team? The guy would survive the first round."