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Joke of the Day

"My goal in life is to be as chill as Forrest Whitaker's left eye"

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"Butts Do not like lies."
"the Bible says ""If a man is to lay with another man he should be stoned."" in my experience it helps"
"Knock! Knock!"
"What do you call a mexican midget? A speck."
"can't wait till the robots turn on us as currently my only regret is that I am statistically most likely to be killed by a human"
"Whats the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi? Dubai don't broadcast the Flintstones but AbuDhabidooooooooo"
"There's a sign at the airport in Pristina Welcome to Kosovo Your car is already here"
"A girl told me she'd only date me if I had a six-pack How can I get beer if I'm under 21?"
"I've got a new pet salamander.. I named it Tiny because it is my newt"