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Joke of the Day

"A guy walks into a bar. A guy walks into a bar with a block of asphalt under his arm, he says to the bartender ""I'll have two beers, one for me and one for the road"""

"Who called it a Spanish teacher instead of an instruction Manuel?"

"My girlfriend started smoking... ...so I slowed down and applied lubricant."

"I hope one day they invent a car named ""The S-Car"" Because everyone will see it and say, ""Look at that S-Car go!"""

"ME: Velma cant see anything without her glasses, so in order to find her glasses, she needs to be wearing them PRIEST: Those are your vows?"

"Ho Ho Ho Do you know; There is a dyslexic devil cult who worship Santa??"

"What do old people smell like? Depends."

"I have a good joke. Say ""Knock knock."""

"How did the Vagina want her eggs cooked? Ovaries-y"

"I am amazing at managing my credit card. My bank keeps sending me letters saying my account is outstanding"