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Joke of the Day

"ME: Velma cant see anything without her glasses, so in order to find her glasses, she needs to be wearing them PRIEST: Those are your vows?"

"Lying on a hospital bed, I pull you in close, and with my dying breath, I whisper, ""Name one of your Pokemon after me"""

"Why do we cry..... When it's the onions that are being hurt?"

"What do you call a soldier who has been mustard gassed and pepper sprayed? A seasoned veteran.. I'm so sorry"

"That was easy... Said Yoda, after to Staples he went."

"The Arkansas lad was obviously deeply troubled. ""Why so glum Chum?"" asked the kindly stranger. ""If my parents get divorced...will they still be brother and sister?"""

"I still don't understand why we are supposed to eat the tampon afterwards"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Blur ! Blur who ? Blur it's cold and wet out here !"

"What did the miner say when he struck gold? Au, yeah!"

"Q: Why did the cat join the Red Cross? A: So it could become a first-aid kit."