137209

Joke of the Day

"I think every guy has tucked their genitalia between their legs to pretend they have a vagina. But I didn't know my girlfriend had been doing it for the past 3 years."

"I put my root beer in a square glass. Now it's just beer."

"Mike Tyson refuses to play on any Playstation... He is an Ex-Boxer."

"There is no law that says you can't smoke celery inside public places. What are they gonna do? Ask you to extinguish your celery? Doubtful."

"What do you call a jewish bodybuilder? Muscletov."

"""Expose yourself to Art"" they said ""Art will tase you and call the cops on you"" they didn't say"

"Dear person who just turned in your resume with no name or phone number. You didn't get the job."

"Don't worry, every TV show, the audience def can't tell that your character just answered a call on his iPhone by tapping an app. We stupid."

"You wanna see the most dangerous animal in the world mate? Go look in the mirror. (I've locked an adult male puma in their bathroom)"

"Oops! I left the curtains open. Now my neighbors know what my junk looks like pressed up against the window with a flashlight aimed at it."