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Joke of the Day

"You know she loves you when you wakeup in a pool of ice in the motel room bathtub with only one kidney removed."

Next Joke
 
"FYI fellas: if u wake up with some chick and u can't remember her name, take her to Starbucks. They'll write her name on the cup for ya!"
"What do you call a grocery store for people with dementia? Question Mart."
"My wife left me *sobs uncontrollably*"
"Grapes.. What did the green grape say to the purple grape?.. BREATHE IDIOT, BREATHE."
"Did you know that Dublin, CA has the fastest growing population of all time? The populations always Dublin'. :D"
"I was on a date last night and the girl said my breath smells like fire. I said, ""yeah, I ate my mixtape."""
"My gf always tells me to shower her with compliments, but when I woke her up with the hose while calling her beautiful she yelled at me"
"All my gay friends must be businessmen... cause they keep talking about their partners."
"""We hug and kiss, but people just don't lick each other."" -yet another lie I just told my toddler"
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