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Joke of the Day

"The wife wants me to be a doctor in our sex role playing. So I guess I'll make her wait an hour, then send her to a specialist"

"League of Legends Joke Why do Jews suck at jungling? Because they always get executed at the first camp."

"What did Picard say when Riker asked him what kind of Chinese food he wanted? ""Make it Tso's Number One."""

"Q: Why did the sheriff arrest the tree? A: Because its leaves rustled."

"9 years ago I asked the girl of my dreams on a date. Today I asked her to marry me. She said no both times."

"Yo mama so old that when she was in school there was no history class."

"captain: a lot of rumors floating around saying I sunk the ship sailor: [clinging to a piece of the hull] please stop calling us rumors sir"

"Did you hear about the restaurant on Mars? ....The food was great, but there was no atmosphere."

"This one time I was hit on by Anthony Kiedis. I only had two options, either give it away... or flea"

"Do you know what the last result of the World Cup was? Spain - 8 Ethiopia - didn't"