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Joke of the Day

"A recent survey asked 12 year old's what was their best accomplishment in 2015. 87 percent of them answered ""your mom"""

"What did the city worker say after his first ever pony trek? I never knew anything stuffed with hay could be so hard!"

"Last week I tried to give up swearing... ...but said ""fuck it"" instead."

"A baby was born with no eyes lids... So the doctors decided to circumcise him and use the skin to craft new eyes lids. They botched it though and he came out looking a bit cock-eyed."

"How do you keep a blonde busy? Put ""flip"" on both sides of a piece of paper"

"What does all pirate music have in common? It's all played in the high C's."

"After Usain Bolt retires, he'll move to Iran."

"I never get my idioms mixed up and you can take that to the bank and smoke it"

"What kind of porn do blind people watch? (NSFW) Ebony"

"Why don't mathematicians ever get blackout drunk? They know their limits."